Eyelids

"Growth does not mean our old patterns disappear. Sometimes it means we become conscious enough to recognize when they have returned."

“Eyelids” feels like the struggle of trying to sever ourselves from something we know we can no longer carry. We shut our eyes to it. Silence it. Remove every reminder. Convince ourselves that we have moved on until eventually we can say, I don’t even know your name. Some parts of ourselves are easier to bury than to change. Some patterns become so deeply woven into us that we may not even clearly know how to name them. We only recognise them when they surface again. A bad habit. An old reaction. An old way of protecting ourselves. Suddenly we are standing inside something familiar, wondering how we found our way back to a place we thought we had already left. But returning to an old pattern does not necessarily mean returning to the old self. The pattern may be familiar, but now there is someone present who can recognise it. Perhaps the work is not to erase every part of ourselves we have outgrown. It is to become conscious enough to meet what remains beneath the floor without letting it quietly become us again.